Like everyone else, the start of a New Year brings me a load of new challenges, some voluntary, some certainly not. This morning I woke up to a mind working overtime, darting form one problem to the next at a million miles an hour; relationships, work, tax return, finances, is the world about to end kinda vibes.
Stepping back I could see that spending mental energy on these problems was the least productive thing I could do. So what was the answer? Sometimes its writing a plan, a list, meditation. I tried reading a short chapter of a book, I couldn’t concentrate, the book was work related and only made the worry cycle worse. Even the old classic of lying in bed staring at the ceiling didn’t seem to help either, surprise surprise!
This morning the only thing that could calm me down was to ignore myself. None of this ‘looking internally’, ‘self care’ stuff. Quite the opposite. I could only look outwards.
I walked down stairs to the living room, it was dark outside minus the street lights and the sound of the odd car driving past. I lit the room lightly with lamps and candles and made some coffee. Washed face, put comfy cloths on, mascara and my favourite scarf. I took a walk through the village and dropped a coffee off to my boyfriend at the shop he was working in. Simple, short conversations with a couple of people. Small talk that could commonly irritate was a welcome comfort. The kids buying crap from the shop and piling onto the school bus. Shops opening up. I walked back home. The sun is now up. Its quiet. I have a few tasks to tackle today, nothing too taxing. My mind is considerably much quieter.
Simplicity, so underrated…